We are in the period where anxiety and envy is now a common thing. Regardless of age, gender and status, we are all guilty to have these kinds of feelings. We can easily be swayed by material things which we don’t have and we eventually define happiness on what others have.
Why do we badly wanted things just to brag it to someone else?
Why do we always feel bad every time we see each other’s differences?
Who’s really at fault?
It may not sound for someone as a brag, but people’s words can be defined in so many ways. They may achieve their goals that sooner but the rest are still striving hard to achieve their own.
Now what is the ideal thing that people need to do in this kind of situation?
Do they need to be more sensitive enough on others wellbeing?
Or others should just simply get rid of their own jealousy and see everything as a motivation?
People maybe just simply proud of what they had attained and that’s acceptable but what it makes it sound off is when people start to compare it to someone else’s life and they start to keep bragging it whenever they have the opportunity.
Most common statements that you may not think that may triggers one’s anxiety are:
There are certain emotions that we can’t really control. That’s makes us human anyway. To control one’s emotions, it takes a guts and efforts for anyone to make it work. Although we can’t just cast it out since it’s simply innate to us, we can still do something for us to suppress this emotion.
How? Let’s tackle everything one step at a time.
STEP 1: Learn to be grateful.
One thing which is very simple to say but really hard to do.
We always wanted to have more and that’s common for everyone.
Who would eat less in a feast?
Who would sleep less if you know you have rest day tomorrow?
Who would not spend if that person has a million on his/her bank?
NOBODY.
Once there’s opportunity to have more, of course everyone will automatically grab it. It may be a rare opportunity so asking for more is way better than regretting everything in the end.
To be grateful is to see the beauty of what lies ahead. It’s a celebration of any accomplishment that you have whether small or big.
No matter how hard the path that you took, you’ll still choose to be happy on whatever outcome it will be. You cam to know that the journey is more worth it than the results and you accept it wholeheartedly.
Once you learned to be grateful, you’ll start to see the day with smile and excitement. Negativity will not foster because you came to realized that every single day is a blessing that is worth to be thankful for.
STEP 2: Choose to love yourself.
After learning to be grateful, loving yourself is your next step to continuously get rid of your jealousy. The only way for you to achieve it is to be proud on who you are before and in the present.
Whatever you’d done in the past makes a part of who you are right now. You can not just simply select the moments where you accept and like yourself.
Embrace your mistakes because that’s how you became stronger.
Focus on the present and do something that your future self will thank you for it.
See everyday as an opportunity to develop and grow. While taking care of someone else, put yourself as a priority as well. You can only give back your 100% if you properly take care of your wellbeing.
If you think that this may sounds as a task, there are simple things that you can do for yourself starting now:
STEP 3: Embrace your flaws.
Loving oneself also means accepting your own flaws. Acceptance comes first above everything else and that’s what you need to do. Skipping this step can not justify your success because it will only pulls you back every time.
Nobody is perfect but you can do something to be close to it.
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Whatever flaws you have, you can always work for it to make it as your own edge. Never ever give up on making it work just because you’re afraid of the outcome.
Always choose to work it out.
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Remember that as long as you live, you still have thousand of chances to be better.
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STEP 4: Let go of the things that restricting you to move forward.
Once you accepted your own flaws and chose to make it better, you need to let go of the things that’s stopping you. Not all will be happy for someone’s happiness and success in life so you need to carefully choose the people around you.
The truth is not everyone will like you.
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You don’t need to strive for anyone’s acceptance and to fit in the society’s requirement. Do things for your own growth and never expect anything in return especially to any person you meet along the way. Not all will appreciate everything you do so you need to accept it beforehand.
Let it go and start to do things genuinely. You can always appreciate your own self even no one does. Though there’s a saying that “There’s no man in an island.”, prove to them than you are fine even you’re alone.
Let go and move forward. Show them what you’ve got.
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STEP 5: Slowly work for your own self.
As you learn to love your own self and acknowledge your flaws, you can slowly work for you to become better. Divert your insecurities into confidence by doing something that can make you feel happy and satisfied. If you keep thinking on ways to become better but still find it hard to start, you need to beat that laziness to begin with.
STOP WITH YOUR EXCUSES!
Doing everything in the beginning is truly hard but if you surpass it, for sure it will be easy for you the next time you do it.
Plan your own ideal productive day and make sure that you’ll make it possible! The strategy is to accommodate one task at a time so that you can gradually cope up with the changes in your usual routine. Some ideas are the following:
STEP 6: Never seek validation.
Whatever you do, never expect someone to acknowledge it because only few truly cares in the first place. Expectation will always be there but you need to put it at the back of your mind. It will only drag you down whenever you keep expecting for someone to appreciate everything you do.
Do everything with your best and make sure that you’re doing it for your growth and not for anyone’s validation. Prove to them that you exist and at the same time make them feel that without appreciation you’re still constant on what you give.
To live a life with no regrets and expectation is the ideal life that one should practice. Never ever feel bad and let everyone know you’re ok.
Be strong and choose to be ok.
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STEP 7: Choose to have a healthy competition.
Comparison will always be present in our life. Wherever you are right now, this is pretty common act of anyone. You’ll never be ok if you keep comparing your life to others, but to get rid of it is surely a hard thing to do. Stop it as early as you can.
If you keep comparing yourself and it will only make you feel down and insecure, STOP IT. But if that comparison will give you an inspiration to do better for yourself, IT’S OK.
Healthy comparison is way better than a toxic one.
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So rather than thinking negatively whenever you come across with someone who’s doing better, divert all your emotions into your own motivation.
Choose to say:
“I can also make it happen.”
“Years from now, I can also achieve my goals like him/her.”
“I’ll dream high and choose to make it all possible like what he/she did.”
STEP 8: Be genuinely happy on other’s success.
For you to successfully achieve the STEP 7, the last but not the least that you should do is to be genuinely proud and happy on anyone’s success.
As we continuously grow up, there will be a lot of challenges that anyone can face. Now our paths will start to become different from each other and it all because on how we see the challenges in front of us.
Some win, some Loss and some never give up despite of the repeated downfalls.
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As people changes, it’s very important that we should accept everyone’s efforts. Be happy for them and see it as an inspiration not to give up.
You have a lot of chances to do well and to be a better version of yourself.
Make more mistakes.
Spend more money.
Because in this life, the best way for us to learn is to do it in a hard way.
Working employee wherein blogging became my side hobby.
Creator of Living Her Own Life which aims to touch people’s heart and inspire them to achieve their own goals in life.
Writing has been my passion for almost 15 years. Last 2020, I made my very own website where I can share all of my thoughts and stories in life.