“Efforts should be appreciated and not neglected.”

Growing up, we all encountered different opinions that made us questioned our own efforts. Oftentimes, we received such response when we are in the situation of gaining something. In reality, not all people will surely be happy to one’s growth. They tend to compare their own selves, so anyone gaining something out of the thing that they thought impossible to do so, they will be in denial of that fact and claim everything as your “LUCK”. This is so sad to know but that’s what happening right now. I’m pretty sure that every one of you encountered that same situation in your life. To deal with such claims is really hard especially if you know how you work hard to get into that place. It wasn’t an easy path and for sure you faced a lot of challenges along the way. None of you don’t want to receive that kind of remark because it makes your efforts invalid.

That’s a simple statement which anyone can do but in reality, find it hard to acknowledge. The question here is “Why?”. Why is it hard for everyone to at least see what the person been through? Why is it easy for anyone to just say negative remarks to others efforts? Why can’t we all live in harmony while being happy for the success of others? It’s so easy to give but nowadays it is so hard to see someone’s genuine acknowledgement. There will always be negative everywhere you go thus making it challenging for everyone to live. It’s a beautiful world to live with but what makes it toxic are people who choose to be negative and at the same time trying to pull someone else down.

Upon realizing how hard it is to live, some of you may feel the anxiety creeping outside of you. STOP IT. Negativity should not considered as a BAD challenge for everyone, rather take it as something that will help you to become more resilient. Bad and Good makes life well balance. It’s all about how you can handle and surpass the negativity that the world will throw at you. Anywhere you are, any company that you’re in, any city you’re living in, there will always be a bad thing about it. Now, your response on that will determine how you handle those situations.

Will you choose to keep quiet?

Will you fight back and tell them what you’d been through?

or

Will you try to do the same by questioning what they’re up to?

Now in this blog, let’s talk about things that you can do in response to this kind of negativity. Let’s see what’s the best option suitable for you and how we can effectively put it into action. These simple things can help you to focus on the positive side of such situations. In any situations, it is better to have a rational approach rather than taking it negatively. Like what most people choose, handling everything with CLASS is way better than anything else.

1. Never expect appreciation to anyone, appreciate yourself first.

The truth is that there will always be something bad wherever you go. No matter how many times you’ll change your environment, negative things will always be there haunting you. Especially when you’re gaining something good in your life, a lot of eyes will be fixated on you. That’s what evil want. They love to challenge someone who receives more blessings because by then, your faith will be tested. Although everyone differs on how they approach a certain challenge in their life, one thing that can help you to handle it very well is to never expect appreciation to anyone because you need to appreciate yourself first.

If you continue to seek validation in every effort you put in, you will never grow as an individual. It will just mean that everything you work for is for you to meet other’s expectation and not because you really wanted to do it for yourself. IT DOESN’T REALLY MAKES SENSE. If you tend to have that kind of approach, you are more vulnerable to all negative things around you. As long as you based your efforts to others, you’ll just feel worse if they won’t reciprocate what you expected them to do so. Now that you are aware of that side of you, this is the right time for you change what you focus on before. Rather than looking to other’s response, why don’t you look to yourself first?

Acknowledge all the efforts and hardships you’d been through.

Reward yourself in every success that you achieved.

Learn to be happy on your own.

OWN YOUR LIFE.

This year, start a good change by not living according to what other’s expect you to be. As long as you’re in the place looking for validations, you’ll find yourself stuck there forever. Take a big leap and change your mindset on how to deal with things. This time, if there’s nobody appreciate you, do it for yourself. If nobody let you feel how important you are, remind yourself how grateful you are to have this kind of life. Choose to be happy because there a lot of reason for you to be one. Remember that before you seek love, care and appreciation to anybody, do it to yourself first.

2. Talk less, listen more and you’ll see each other’s differences.

Oftentimes people choose to stay in an environment they’re comfortable with despite of the toxic people around them. Although there will be negativity anywhere you’ll go and you can’t really avoid it, cutting it off is way better than tolerating it. If you can’t move yourself out and there’s no other choice but to live with it, the best thing you can do is to have your own space where they can’t step into it. Over familiarization is one of the common reasons why most of the time people around us can comfortably say whatever they want to. Since we usually trust right away just from exchanging conversation with others, we tend to easily share everything even we don’t purposely do it.

Settle as a listener before engaging into a certain group of people. By doing that, you can assess their characteristics and be aware on their specific attitudes. This will also help you to inhibit yourself to share information that may end up for them to comfortably tell things that may hurt you. It’s ok to be alone. As you grow up, you’ll realized that peace of mind can be find in so many ways, like simply being alone. You don’t need to feel pressured on involving yourself in an environment just to validate your existence. Rather than wasting time to fit in, it is better to focus on things for your own self-development. Although there’s a saying the “No man is an Island.”, it is very important to choose a place that’s best for you. Ask yourself what it really needs and not what anyone wants. In every decision you’ll make, you need to consider yourself first.

If ever you’ll be in that situation when someone tells you something that is off, as long as you know his/her nature, that will help you to deliberate a right response for it. You don’t need to feel bad about it as long as you know your efforts. You don’t need to correct them as well since whatever you do, you can’t really change someone’s perception. Talk less, listen and focus on your true self.

3. Know your TRUE SELF.

In any situation that will arise in our life, it is very important to know yourself above anyone else. As long as you know the truth about yourself, no one can take it away from you. They will continuously test your faith and they will not give up on breaking yourself. Negativity and toxicity will always be there, so the only thing that you can do is to be resilient enough in handling those situations. Knowing that you’re complete inside, no challenges can bring you down.

In knowing your true self, you should consider both positive and negative side of you. You need to be aware of your own attitude so that, you can control your emotions. Most of the time, your responses in certain situations are due to your emotion which you can’t hold back. That’s how regrets comes in. Before you stop yourself in telling bad things, its already done since you let your emotions win over your own control. You choose to control things outside your boundaries and refuse to be corrected so you end up trying to change the things around you. That’s the worst thing that always happen to anyone.

This time, choose to empower yourself more. After knowing your strength and weaknesses, slowly work on it and be a better version of you. Continuously work on something that will change and push you to know more of your potentials. As long as you don’t focus on negativity, positive things will soon follow you in every decision that you’ll make. It’s all about how you fix your mindset to focus on the positive side of every situation. Anything that others may throw at you will just serve as a mere thing in your life. You can’t even look into it because you choose to do things that is more productive than it. Knowing your true self is everything. Explore more about you and have time for a day to develop and nurture every aspect of your life.

“Finding your true self means embracing your strength and flaws.”

“Let others bring you down, but prove to yourself that you can always surpass it.”

“Set your daily intention and keep yourself busy in building your own life.”

4. Let your success speak for itself.

One of the best methods that one can do in negative situation like this is to let the result of their action speak for itself. Never let your plans be known and let them be surprise about it once they see personally the results of your efforts. Sharing your plans oftentimes attract negativity, why? It is simply because in reality, not all of them will genuinely support you. Their own insecurities will not let others win over something that they failed to do. So rather than sharing it to anyone, work for your goals quietly and with patience.

In planning things, failures will also be present. You can’t always be successful because failures will give you more strength to carry on. You’ll feel doubtful, insecure and maybe also lose your confidence, but you need to survive from it in order to continue what you started. Never back down on whatever others will say to you, but choose to let your patience win over it. There will always be a perfect timing for everything. As long as you grow as an individual, expect that more people will pull you down. They will only stop if they know that no matter what they do, you won’t be affected by it.

Be calm and trust the process.

Let them talk because that just shows that you are growing. The more successful you’ll be, the more eyes will focus on you. Just take it as motivation to be more dedicated in everything that you do. In that way, you won’t focus on the negative side of the situation but redirect it as an opportunity for you to develop yourself.

5. Breathe & let it all go.

Stop for a moment and pause for a while. Whenever you feel like your emotions are too overwhelming, choose to calm yourself before doing something you’ll regret in the end. Negativity triggers you to do something out of your control that’s why oftentimes people response in a wrong manner once they’re in that situation. As long as you follow the things mentioned above, it will help you to slow down your emotions and make the right choice.

There will always be negative thing wherever you’ll go, so you need to keep in mind that the choice to handle it will be yours. Any situation will just pass by, but every word you’ll say can make an imprint to your personality. You just need to be careful, be wary and let the bad times pass by.

Don’t let stress and negative situations bring you down.